“What if, there was a tropical storm”

“What if there is a heat wave?”

“What if I meet the man of my dreams, and he invites me to go to Monaco at the spur of the moment and I will need a black tie dress?”

You  never want to wear those brand new shoes that took two weeks to find in a rain storm. You know they only  became available because some cranky husband made his wife stick to her budget and return them.  You get it and you pack the Plan B shoes. As a fashion person you also understand the need travel with something that can be dressed up or down and look chic.

I think my best lesson for over packing or too much baggage would be to force me  to  get all my possessions  from point A to point B  on my own.

No valet, no bellman, no husband, no strong boyfriend, just me. 

Which brings me to the REAL topic of too much BAGGAGE.

I am talking about the kind we bring into relationships. The past heartache’s, trust issues, ex-wives, ex-girlfriends, baby mama’s, kids, parents, pets, mortgages, bankruptcies.

What is the right way or the wrong way to deal with other people’s issues and stuff? Is there a MANUAL ON THIS? What section would you find this in? Self-Help???

 Sort of like a hauling service that we can call?

1.800.remove.the.bullshit

“Sir, I’d like to get a rate on  towing an emotionally clingy ex-wife  who hasn’t let go?”  

“Sir, I’d like to get a rate on children who refuse to let a new woman in their father’s life.  They are afraid dad will realize they are hanging around to stay close to the MONEY.”

“Sir, how about a mom who uses her son as her primary male figure because her husband is out doing God knows what with God knows who. She has left him without any room for another woman to be in his life; And the son feels guilty.”

“Sir, How are you supposed to deal with an acquaintance who want’s to introduce you to her fabulously wealthy ex-husband?” “Are you supposed to say you’re not interested? You’re too deep in those anyway, laugh out loud.”

“And Sir, before I finish there this  friend thing , Mine says I  can’t be friends with someone, because she and that person  don’t speak anymore.”

If only you really were able to tell people how they should deal all of these situations. In most cases these can be real deal breakers. I am not kidding when I tell the story of a boyfriend with an ex wife who wanted to go on vacation with us since he was taking his daughter along on the trip.

Or I know of a mother who made sure her sons choices were NEVER good enough and everything he bought  for the girlfriend he had to buy for the mother (or keep it top secret.)

Or the friend who gave her ex husband my number only to call me every day to see if he called.  Who was the test for me or him?

If only real life was easy as removing the four extra shoes you packed in your suitcase and leaving them behind.

We all want someone with life experience, who knows how to do the right thing. Is there such a thing as the right thing? Or is it, “What feels right for you?”

I personally would like somebody who relatively clear of pre-existing baggage, or has all ready learned how to deal with it. I am starting to feel like it’s choosing the  winning lottery ticket.

I suddenly feel like I just created more room in my suitcase.